Queenly Things

Sim Sala Bim

We all know I have a rather sordid history with green vegetables - my mom liking to boil those nasty things into submission. And though I eat tons of green things these days, I'd be lying to say I wasn't always a little hesitant each time I take a mouthful of vegginess. Recently, I learned a magic trick to make a rather misunderstood leafy veg into a snack. That's right - a munchy mouthfull of crispy delight. So, izzy wizzy let's get busy, and I'll show you my new trick.

That's kale up there in the photos. Now, I learned this from Jacque Pepin, a veritable magician in the kitchen. It's quick and easy and makes somewhat unlikeable leaves into snappy little snacks. Wash the leaves of kale and pat them dry, very dry. Next tear them up into smaller pieces and toss the leaves with a few spoonfuls of olive oil and a sprinkle of sea salt ( or any season-y kind of thing you think would be good). Bubble, bubble, no toil, no trouble.

You're going to spread those lovely verdant pieces onto a cooking sheet. One layer is best so they crisp up nicely. Into a 350º oven for 25 - 30 minutes. Abracadabra, please and thank you.

Looks like mulch, I know, but really those limp ol' leaves become - well not like potato chips as someone online suggested, but - the perfect salty low-cal but darn tasty vehicles for - what? Onion or clam dip maybe? Perhaps a dollop of blue cheese? Hummus? Smoked salmon? Caviar? The mind reels. Try it if for no other reason than to see the magic. You do believe in magic don't you?

 

You Bet Your Sweet Bippy

Still bustin' the stash, I am. Came across this delightful tutorial over on Whip Up and thought, "I can do that." Ring my chimes.

While the author of the tutorial used linen to make her scarf, it should be noted that she is writing from Australia where the weather is turning balmy. I am in the Northern Hemisphere where winter has landed. So I used a loose-woven wool challis in a very psychedelic print. Yeah, baby, yeah!!!

Since I'm a matchy-matchy girl, it was challenging to mix prints and I hesitated many times and grabbed something safer. But in the end I came back to this combo and am loving it! Sock it to me!!

The tutorial's measurements were rather suggestions, I just took the length of fabric I had - about two yards - and cut a swath the width of the pattern I wanted to encompass. Look that up in your Funk and Wagnall's

After the sewing was done, I threw the whole kit and kaboodle in the washer and dryer. The Wool felted up nicely and the cotton trim was left to a lovely ripple. And that's the truth.

Confused by the bits in italics? Here's a reference to help you since the flying fickle finger of fate has left you out of the loop. Wanna buy a Walnetto?

Psychedelic!!!

Rose Parade

I know, I know everything's coming up roses at Queenly Things. What can I say, I love me some roses. While I was crocheting that last batch I wondered if I couldn't use up some of piles of felted sweaters and wool to make even more roses, a veritable mountain of roses could be mine. I could tumble down mounds of soft, wooly roses - cashmere roses even. I mean who wouldn't want to?

 

I took one of the crocheted rosesI'd made and used it as a pattern. Then I just cut out bunches of these coils from old blankies, moth-eaten sweaters and whatever other scrumptiousness I could find.

To form the flower, just wrap 'round and 'round until it looks like this on the bottom. I wrapped so that the right side (the purl side) of the knit was on the inside.

I stitched from the inside out in spokes, kind of shaping the rose as I went. And that's it. Five minutes tops from start to finish.

What to do with all that rosiness? A hat perhaps?

Decorate a scarf...

or scarves.

Rosy brooches for a lapel

Spiff up a new pillow cover.

You can put all your roses in one basket...

And crown yourself Queen of the Rose Parade.

(the beautiful crown basket is from Alice Ann, my yellow rose in Texas.)

 

Brownie Points

For just a few years back in the 1860's, Mexico was ruled by France in the form of Emperor Maximilian and Empress Carlota. This envoy brought along to the New World many royal bakers who cranked out batons and baguettes for their lieges' elegant tables. And as is so often the case, the whole country wanted to be Frawnch and so they, too, learned the art of bread baking from the interlopers trend setters. However, the Gallic entourage only managed to hold on to their rule for seven years or so and thus failed to get to the chocolate lessons. And alas, Mexico, the land where cacao originates, was left without a lot of good recipes.

Enter the Queen some 130 years later. In class one day, probably trying to distract me from matters at hand, one of my students wondered aloud, but in English, whether I knew how to make this really good thing she'd tried in the states, those "browns" you know. "Brownies? Chocolate square thingies?" " Si!! Brownies" "Oh, mais oui, I do indeed". And a new career for the Queen was born.

Every weeknight for the rest of my years living Mexico, I made a huge commercial-size pan of brownies and often another huge pan of something else American - blondies, cheesecake, oatmeal cookies, magic squares, cupcakes - to sell to the delectable-goody-deprived children of upper class Cancun. 

This morning I'm baking up a batch of brownies for my goody-deprived grandson, who went out on his own earlier this year with little culinary knowledge  save for how make Frawnch Toast and Spaghetti Sauce. I am using the simple recipe that earned me many pesos back in the day and is, to my mind the easiest, and best, typical brownie recipe.

You'll have everything you'll need for these in your cupboard. Even if you don't have unsweetened chocolate squares you can substitute 3Tbsp. unsweetened cocoa powder and 1 Tbsp. butter for each square. It all gets melted together anyway so, really, there is no difference at all.

Eggs, butter, flour - what could be simpler? 

A little batter in your java?

Don't beat things too much - you just want to get a nice melange/mescla.

I explained to my Mexican students that the truly best part of American home-baking was licking the bowl and beaters - raw eggs be darned. That was a little much for them to take in but you guys know what I'm talking about.

Those little brown square thingies. Oh, My, Dios!!

And that's how brownies got introduced South of the Border. I still get sweet messages from my now-grown-up students filled with love and good memories but always with dreamy recollections of the baked goods I provided them. Quite the legacy, I guess.

Buen provecho/ bon apetit/have at 'em.

 

A Banner Idea

I am decidedly cranky. And I've been this cranky for a while now. I think my good nature went on a trip and left a nasty old lady to housesit. I can barely get in the door at work of a morning without someone rasping on my nerves and harshing on my morning mellow. 

I am suffering from testiness and daggummitude with a mountainside of impatience. I want people who want to borrow my brain instead of using their own to be kicked off the island. I want scarily anxious folks to get a grip on something other than my arm. I want the phone to stop ringing and everybody to play nice!!!!  

I needed a mantra, some soothing word or phrase, something to remind me to take a breath and remember what's good. Something to kick me in the butt when the snarkiness tries to escape my mouth. Something that will elbow me in the ribs with the message that the world would be a nicer place without a snippy Ms. Queen on the loose.

Give thanks.

I will try to conjure it up when black thoughts cloud my vision, I will tattoo it to the back of my forehead.  I will write it 500 times on the whiteboard and I will do it for homework every day. I'll have it for breakfast and wear it on a chain around my neck. I'm putting it on my speed dial and ordering a ton of it on the internet. My gas tank is filled with it now and I painted each and every toe and fingernail with that color. 

Give thanks.

Despite all my efforts though, I might still need a reminder now and again from you.

Never Out of Date

You must remember this 
Thrift is always thrift, a sigh is just a sigh. 
The fundamental things apply 
As time goes by.

And when thrift lovers woo 
They still say, "I love you." 
On that you can rely

 
No matter what the future brings 
As time goes by.

Moonlight and love songs 
Never out of date. 
Hearts full of passion 
Jealousy and hate. 
Woman needs thrift 
And thrift must have its way 
That no one can deny.

It's still the same old story. A fight for old embroidery. A case of do or buy.

The world will always welcome thrift lovers. As time goes by.

  

As time goes by.

Q Gardens

 Summer may be over and the bloom off the rose in other parts of the hemisphere

But here in the Queen's messy little workshop the posies are still bursting forth in amazing abundance.

The industrious craftspeople working overtime spinning threads of gold.

Only the richest silks and ermine... no wait, that's Opal.

Only the richest silks are woven to form the most delicate blossoms.

The finest wool from royal sheep is adorned with pearls born in the briny waters of the realm.

The Queen's gardens are overflowing with such delights

The Queen's cat is overburdened with much nonsense.

 

Read the Swedes

The blame can be set quite squarely on the shoulders of Kenneth Branagh, I believe. I'm fairly certain that's how I got hooked. Hooked on Swedish mysteries, that is. After watching the Wallander series on PBS last spring I had to have more. And more. And more. In fact, I spent most of the summer in the Land of the Midnight Sun - literarily speaking. Those dark mysteries, the surly detective, the brilliant Swedish landscape.  I couldn't resist the lure.

I started with Henning Mankell, the author of the Wallander books. The book that was available in my library was "Kennedy's Brain" - not in the Wallander series but a very good choice. It's about a woman, an archeologist, whose grown son is found dead in his apartment in Spain, a situation which draws her into a cross country investigation. Many of the books I read had marvelous female protagonists, whether written by male or female authors. 

Next, I picked up a book by Asa Larsson who writes about a cold place called Kiruna, near the top of the world and whose main character is a small lonely woman lawyer with limited social skills. Most of the story takes place in the cold desolate winter and I was so taken with this book that I checked out another in the series.

I managed to herd through a number of authors and wasn't disappointed by a one of them.

Kjell Larsson

Anna Jansson

Hakan Nesser

These were my best picks.

Then I came upon this one - The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. Stieg Larsson, the author, died in 2004 but not before turning in manuscripts for three mysteries. This is the first one. I just finished the second - The Girl Who Played With Fire, and have pre-ordered The Girl Who Kicked a Hornets' Nest which comes out in the spring. Just Friday I heard a BBC report about the phenomenon of these books both in Sweden and the English-speaking world. There's rumored to be movies in the making and even of a fourth, unfinished manuscript. They are that good. 

With winter weather just around the bend, the time is right for curling up with a good Swedish mystery.

Var sa God as my mother always used to say.

A Paradise Where Roses Grew

Sometimes I wonder why I spend
The lonely night dreaming of a song
The melody haunts my reverie
And I am once again with you
When our love was new
And each kiss an inspiration

But that was long ago
Now my consolation
Is in the stardust of a song

Beside a garden wall
When stars are bright
You are in my arms
The nightingale tells his fairy tale
of paradise where roses gre

Though I dream in vain
In my heart it will remain
My stardust melody
The memory of love's refrain

Gotta a Lotta Ricotta?

I boughta lotta ricotta.

But I kinda forgotta use it. 

And I thoughta oughta.

So it wouldn't rotta...way.

Ricotta pancakes - lite. Notta bad idea. 

And a spotta vanilla broughta lotta flavor. 

Put on a potta coffee and enjoy.

Ricotta Pancakes

makes 6 fat cakes

1/2 cup Heart Smart Bisquick mix

1/4 cup non-fat ricotta

1/4 low or non-fat milk

2 tsps. vanilla

Stir just until the Bisquick is incorporated.

Cook slowly on notta too hotta griddle.

Thick, rich hotcakes with notta a jotta heaviness.

You oughta try 'em.

Whatta way to start the day.